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Posts tagged ‘patience’

6 things I wish I would’ve never said to my children…..

1.) Hush or shhhh or shut up – We are all guilty of it. Kids are meant to be loud. Its apart of them being KIDS. Sometimes my kids are so loud if I am watching TV I will turn it to volume 50 just so I can hear what is going on. I’ve learned over the last few months that the older they get, the louder they get….so whatever is on TV….it can wait….let those kids be just that….KIDS….They wont be loud forever….and lord knows they wont be kids forever. 

2.) We don’t have time for that – Another way of saying “I don’t feel like doing this”. MAKE TIME. Like I said above they wont be kids forever….and you have to treasure every second that you have them. Before you know it, they will be in college and wont want to build legos anymore, or play NERF guns, or paint stupid hand trees that you found on pinterest. It doesn’t matter what it is…..make the time….don’t tell them that you don’t have time because you can absolutely find 5 minutes to do whatever your child wants to do. 

3.) I’m busy OR maybe later – No…..you’re not busy…..you just want to finish what you are doing uninterrupted. Like for me vacuuming every day is something I am super OCD about….but you know what? The floors will be dirty tomorrow and will still need to be vacuumed. You’re never to busy to watch a show with them, read them a book, or just BE with them.

4.) Let me do it myself – Oh this is a big one I wish I would never say to my kids. As everyone knows I have an 8 year old and a 5 year old and they are both very into helping mommy do things. Ive actually had the 8 year start doing laundry and the 5 year old help me cook dinner. Normally I would tell them to leave me alone….or let me finish what I am doing so it gets done right….but there’s in no right or wrong way to do something when they are that age. They need to learn how to do things. Trial and error people. Trial and error.

5.) GO away – Yes, I am guilty of telling one of my children to go away….most of the time its in the middle of a conversation with their father, or I am on the phone with someone….but you know what? Those people can wait…your children cannot. Nor will they.

6.)  You’re not doing that right – False…..there is no wrong way to do whatever it is that they are doing. Let’s talk about common core math for a second. My second grader struggles in math and I learned basic math in school. So its very hard for me when it comes to common core to tell him that he isnt doing something right….because he is just doing it DIFFERENT than what I learned. Talk about a learning opportunity for both of us. This applies to everything. Even teaching them to clean their room or make their bed. Do not ever tell your child they are not doing something right….it just degrades them. 

Being a parent is a learning process. We are all going to make mistakes. Big ones. Little ones. Ones that dont even matter in their upbringing. But they will make mistakes too. But how we respond to their mistakes and requests will shape them into the adult/husband/wife/parent that they are going to be. Out of 3 kids I can tell you that I have made probably close to a million mistakes….but you know what? Parenting isn’t a perfect science and it never will be. Our children teach us things daily that we dont even realize. Take a second and look at the things that your children are doing or saying. Learn to be a better parent FROM your child. No self help book or parenting class can teach you what your children will. They are my greatest achievement. And I hope to continue to learn from each child every day as they grow. I hope to learn more patience for each child….because quite frankly each of them needs a different amount of patience. I hope to god that one day my kids will look back and say “my mom was the best mom EVER”……